Monday, October 21, 2013

UPDATE: Give Your Heart A Break: Today, is the day I finally asked about his smoking habit and some bits of pieces of how I felt. Let me tell you it did not go well at all, he acted as if he didn't give a care and he wanted me to leave. It wasn't him, it wasn't him! He is NOT the guy who I fell in-love with. So, here I am typing this to you guys on how my love life is another EPIC FAIL. He changed! I don't know what happened, but he changed. He doesn't give me that look anymore, he doesn't talk to me as much anymore, he just isn't the guy I thought he was. Was it all a lie? This story, turned out to be a fable in disguise? I did cry again and this time I did not hold back not one tear. They say let the guy chase you, but how can I when I'm afraid he's not going too. Before, I had left him there, I told him that I needed a week to think and that I'll contact him when I'm ready to talk. Truthfully, my friends and family all want me to cut the connection, but "BUT!" I don't want too. I did all the right things only to be played with.. I am a toy to the criminology. They love to play with my feelings and watch me fall then dance around for them. Is this something I was meant to do? I looked up to the sky taking deep breathes with me and just wondering and asking God. Why? I could have spent my whole life not knowing these guys and not even wasting another second of a tear on him. A week, I said and he told me something that I didn't want to hear which was "Bahala Ka" (Do whatever you want). My heart took flight, before I could even catch it. My mind is too weak, I couldn't stop it. Yes, I know that now and that is why this week I will try my hardest to move on forward and not take everything so seriously. Smile now, Panda. They said. You're our Princess, they said.

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