Wednesday, April 24, 2013

UPDATES: What's On My Mind These Days

My Thoughts:

Boston Marathon Bombing

I know it's far too late, but I could say that I pray think is more like it, about the Boston Marathon and recent  terrorists attack. Because people are still talking about it all over the news, sometimes I wonder what the government can do, then just talk? You know  tell something we don't know, and prove how much they want to protect us then hide behind the safe barriers of their houses and hollow halls. As, a kid to them I know it's hard to ask of them, but I just want to show a little bit of security so I wouldn't have to worry so much about my Mom, it could take a toll on me sometimes.(I'm not paranoid!I'm just very well informed, because I want to be..I don't want to live my life then not give a damn about others, I want to be in the conversation and if that's even any help at least a little comfort, as do a prayer once in a while those who cannot.)  I wouldn't want another 9/11 the truth hurts, but ever since I saw that on T.V. when I was a kid I've always been afraid that something like that could happen again. Sometimes when I'm all alone I pray a very long prayer just in case. At church I pray not just for myself, but everybody~It's just my luck hoping that God could protect us all even though it may be a burden for him.


Bills, Broken Utilities, Debts, and Summer Vacation

I can see how this topic maybe of a nuisance for you..all who read this randomly. I love to have a voice and say my opinions otherwise I'm just one of the bunch sugar-coated with the same design(metaphorically speaking!) The bills have gone higher because our only source of power is cheating us, by planning frequent black-outs..lemme tell ya it's not fun to see nothing especially when your too clumsy I think I tripped on a chair twice on the same toe too! Then the washer needs to be replaced and other things as well, how much is this gonna cost us with the  insurance money my grandparents are receiving it'll be okay, but I have my doubts about that when we still have debts from my other grandma and grandpa who helped my Mom get out of here. They need to pay them back first..Mommy has gotten a solid job already and  hopefully by August she'll get a raise at the AFS West Office soon. She's been working so hard lately, because two of the managers keep on taking leaves, my Mom is left to do all the work downstairs and upstairs. Good thing she got a day off! Summer Vacation, is going swell and a bit prudish I guess I can say..it's so hot and I feel lazy then all worked-up the next! It's impossible to go outside otherwise you'll get a massive sunburn quickly or you'll just get an automatic heatstroke from walking out the door. I know I'm being a bit over dramatic, but I'm telling you the truth! If you were here you would feel the heat wave too even if your in your own house! The only save cool place is in the shower under the running water...earlier this afternoon, I was enjoying the water and thinking about random topics to type to you and suddenly the toothpaste I had put out on my toothbrush had flicked in my eye! It was a real stinger at first but I quickly washed it out with water and everything cool down. That! I will have to pay more attention too next time.


Pregnancy and Celebrities

I was talking to my sister while she was watching Korean dance groups dance to Beyonce's songs..She had told me that Beyonce lost her second child, because she was dancing careless and had a miscarriage afterwards. First, I did not know that she was pregnant again and my thoughts and prayers are with her, but second I had this coming for long time already. Because, she pushes herself too hard and the way she dances I love it and all, but she could have been more careful..I mean what's point have having a baby if you would put your won work before your baby's health. Is it not worth the risk? I  hope she feels better though, the poor thing. Then my Mom had broughten up the subject of the Royal Family, which I have been under-informed because they haven't been to as lately in the public eye much. Anyway, all I got from my Mom was that if i's a girl they'll name her "Diane/Diana" after Princess Diana, and something about two months. And, hot the general public thinks she's far too skinny and well not as big as she should be while carrying a child. All this baby talk led to of course the never-ending talk of the town Kardashians! She looks like Jessica Simpson during her pregnancy with baby Maxwell, but she looks far worst because she wears these things that could suffocate her baby! Tight dresses from who knows where??? Let's just hope they're elastic!


Self-Reflection

I've been self-reflecting lately and I think it has something to do with me reading Anne Frank's Dairy.  First off, I have a diary too and I feel like I'm invading her privacy as very much as somebody would too if they were reading mine.  I never seem to get that thought away from my head. I love her diary so much that I wish I could have been smart as she,  at the age of fourteen I was still in a dark place with no one to pull me out or even just give a hand. The things she's been through and the lessons she had to learn on her own. Had a great deal of an affect on me. I can connect with her more than my other many closet and dearest family members or even friends! I highlight a few sentences or phrases here and there and I use them as principles on how I look at life. Also, if anyone to ask how I'm doing..I would say I'm fine, though I believe fine is not a feeling but a mere excuse to hide the truth or say or unsatisfied with something or someone. Last year, I longed for something, but I didn't know what it was, I just felt like something was missing and that made miserable. But, now that it's been a new year and new things are to come and go, I feel refreshed and ready to go wherever life takes me. I'm contented and happy is what I've been feeling but sometimes my emotions can change in an instant when noon comes. And, I don't know why is that? I'm bored to bits at home, but because I have internet and my laptop and nook and etc. I feel like I could stay home and not enjoy the sun on my face or wind in my hair at all. So, self-reflection..it makes me appreciate what I have now and what I've been missing in the past. Improving myself to be a better person is what I only want.


Time is running out..It's far too late and some of the other happenings or things that are running around in my head are nearly finished or typed on this post. I'll call it a night and well at least, I was bring honest.

P.S. I hope you guys don't read too much into it. Because, really I'm just everybody else trying to express myself as a whole.

Yours Truly ,
Ashley 

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